The Preschool Years: Raising Children with Lasting Values

Name: The Preschool Years: Raising Children with Lasting Values
ISBN: 9787547732502

多萝西·劳·诺尔蒂 / 雷切尔·哈里斯Beijing Daily Press2021

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Word count: 90K words
Chapters: 1
Series: Zito Book Library
ISBN: 9787547732502

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Summary

For children, parents are the first people they meet in life and the most influential role models. In everyday life, children absorb and learn from their parents, for better or worse. This book is based on Dorothy Law Nolte's 1954 parenting poem "Children Learn What They Live," co-written with family psychotherapist Rachel Harris. The poem's famous lines—"If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn; if children live with encouragement, they learn to be confident"—have been translated into more than thirty languages and have endured for decades as parenting maxims. The book explores the connection between seventeen family environments and the formation of children's character, drawing on 94 concrete real-life cases. From emotional management, values formation, and communication styles, it shows how parents' words and actions subtly shape children's psychology, personality, and behavior. The cases are close to daily life, covering common situations such as children throwing tantrums, using foul language, procrastinating, lying after making mistakes, sibling rivalry, and parents arguing; the authors offer actionable response strategies and help parents become aware of their own interaction patterns with their children. As a parenting book passed down through three generations, it advocates positive guidance, trust, and respect to cultivate honesty, respect, gratitude, patience, responsibility, and self-trust in children, offering parents a down-to-earth rather than empty parenting reference.

Editor's review

很多教养书谈理念，却很少把“怎么说、怎么做”讲到日常细节。《一流的教养》的长处正在于落地：94个案例几乎都是家里天天上演的场景——孩子打翻东西、磨蹭不肯出门、对同伴发火、被批评后撒谎。作者不急着评判父母，而是先把场景摊开，让人看见自己脱口而出的那句话，孩子听成了什么。全书结构清晰，19章对应19种家庭氛围，每章由若干案例串起，读一章就能对应到自己家的某一天。它不提供速效技巧，也不许诺“三天改变孩子”，而是反复提示一个朴素的事实：教养发生在无数个不起眼的瞬间，父母的语气、眼神和处理方式，就是孩子学习如何处理情绪与关系的教材。适合放在床头随手翻，也适合夫妻共读、对照讨论。译文通顺，案例有生活气，读起来不费力。

Who it's for

A good fit for

家有幼儿或学龄儿童、希望改善日常沟通方式的父母
常因孩子情绪爆发而失控、事后又自责的家长
准备系统建立家庭教育观念的新手父母
幼儿园、小学教师及家庭教育指导从业者

Not a good fit for

希望获得速效管教技巧或严格训练法的读者
孩子已进入青春期、专找青少年专题方案的家长
只想读理论体系、不偏好案例式写法的研究者

Reading tips

不必从头读到尾，先挑与自己当下困扰最贴近的章节，读完当天就试着用一次。
每个案例读完后停顿片刻，回想自己最近一次类似场景是怎么回应的，写下可替换的一句话。
与伴侣轮流阅读同一章，再讨论彼此在教养方式上的差异，比单方面说教更有效。
把它当作长期工具书，孩子进入新阶段时重读相应章节，会有不同的体会。

About the publisher

Beijing Daily Press China · Founded in 1981

Beijing Daily Press takes world history, historical reading and foreign literary translations as important publishing directions, alongside science fiction and prose. Its catalogue includes Edward Gibbon's unabridged The History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Gu Cheng's Southern Ming History and his works on Ming history, reflecting a balance between general and dynastic history; in literature there are Fu Lei's translations of Balzac and of world classics, as well as science fiction and prose such as The Universe Omnipotent Detective Agency, A Canticle for Leibowitz and The Peregrine, with authors ranging from Gibbon, Gu Cheng and Balzac to Fu Lei, Romain Rolland and Douglas Adams. Building on current affairs, history and culture, Beijing-flavoured culture and children's books, the press combines classic translation with original historical writing, emphasising complete editions and translation quality. Public information is limited, so other details are omitted.

Purple Book Series

FAQ

这本书和同名其他版本是同一本吗？

不是。市面上有多本同名书，本书是北京日报出版社2021年版，作者为多萝西·劳·诺尔蒂与雷切尔·哈里斯，译者周彦希，ISBN 9787547732502；另有金武贵、杰瑞米·克拉克等不同作者的版本，购买时请核对作者与ISBN。

书中提到的94个案例是真实案例吗？

书中案例取材于两位作者三十多年的儿童教育与家庭治疗实践，用于说明父母言行与孩子反应之间的关联；它们属于典型化、生活化的教养情境，不宜当作严谨的临床研究数据来引用。

没有育儿基础，直接读会不会吃力？

不会。全书以故事化案例加简短分析的方式展开，语言通俗，几乎不使用专业术语，零基础父母可以从任一章节读起。

书里的方法适合多大年龄的孩子？

案例主要围绕幼儿与学龄儿童的家庭生活场景，所讲的沟通原则对更小的孩子和更大一些的孩子也有参考价值，但青春期专题问题需另找专门读物。

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About the author

多萝西·劳·诺尔蒂 Author

Dorothy Law Nolte is an author whose work centers on parenting. Publicly available information about her is limited, and the library holds one title by her, Wisdom for Parenting (2 volumes). Judging from the title and its classification, the book addresses readers interested in family education, focusing on parenting ideas and everyday child-rearing methods; it is a practical parent-child education title. Owing to limited sources, her life, nationality, and full body of work cannot be described in detail, but it is clear that her writing centers on parenting, presented systematically in volume form so that readers can read and consult the material in a concentrated way. For parents seeking guidance on raising children, this work offers an accessible point of entry and reflects the author's sustained attention to parent-child education.

雷切尔·哈里斯 Author · British

Rachel Harris is a British author about whom limited public information is available. Her nationality is confirmed as British, and her representative work is The Art of Wise Parenting (2 volumes), commonly classified under parenting. However, a separate profile in the database describes her as an ethnomusicologist at SOAS, University of London, researching the musical cultures of Inner and Central Asia. This identity sits uneasily with a parenting title, and the available information is not sufficient to clarify the relationship, so readers should treat it with caution. As for the work itself, The Art of Wise Parenting addresses everyday parenting practice for family settings and is published in two volumes, reflecting the author's sustained attention to parent-child upbringing. Because public details of her life and academic background are limited, this profile makes no further inferences about her education, positions or experience, and readers are advised to consult the book itself to judge its approach and value.